I'll be home for Christmas

Querida familia,

I have a lot of things on my mind with more things continuing to pop up, so I hope I'm able to express myself as coherently as possible. This December we have a Christmas theme of a White Christmas. We all know it won't snow here, but we'll have a white Christmas seeing many truly converted people baptized this month. Because of that, it's also a miracle month, and as a mission, when we experience miracles, we call them in to share them with the zone and the whole mission eventually. (I haven't been the best at doing that, though.) On Tuesday we had a meeting with all the zone leaders (and exchange sisters) where we discussed our mission goals. Our goal is to have each companionship baptize at least one person during December. Our zone leaders called us after the meeting and asked us to call in a miracle that day. I got off the phone and told Sister Marroquin that we had to have a miracle and call it in. She was really confused and said that hopefully we'd get one. I told her that we would get one because we were assigned a miracle and there was just no other option. :) So we were searching for a miracle all day and I was sure it was going to be one of those instances where you work so hard all day and at 8:30 before you turn home you would meet that golden person who want to be baptized. But it didn't happen that way.

We met a potential investigator a few weeks ago who told us that she is surrounded by negative people and that when we knocked on her door she felt hope and peace. Her mom is not our biggest fan (or the biggest fan of missionaries or church or something, we're not sure), so when she answers the door we don't even get a "hi" in before the door is shut in our faces. We have been trying to look for Sandra, and she had told us the week before that she was moving into a different apartment in the same building, and since we can't get any info from her mom we did what missionaries do best and started knocking every door. This building is really funky because there are four hallways (three floors) that meet up in the middle and we got completely lost and forgot which doors we had knocked before. So we started and we ended up seeing a lady from the week before who had already rejected us, and then I remembered she told us the woman across from her spoke Spanish but was rarely home. So after apologizing and saying goodbye we knocked the neighbor's door. Tamara opened the door and told us about how she has been going to various churches and is not satisfied with how people don't even prepare to go to church (just roll out of bed) or they just throw Christ's name out there just for the sake of saying it. We told her how much our Savior means to us and bore testimony that she will be happy and satisfied with the message we share. She let us in, and we met her daughter who's 16 and her son who's 2. Tamara speaks perfect English but is from... PUERTO RICO! We had a great lesson with her--she and her daughter were very receptive and she said she wants her children to be baptized. We told her the little way can wait till he's 8 :) and we invited them to church on Sunday. The next day we went by to ask if they want to go to church in Spanish or English (because her daughter doesn't speak Spanish), and they chose Spanish (I think because they really like us... we probably shouldn't have gone back... but they were our miracle... and we gave them the option...). They came to church! They were excited about it! And they loved it. And they said they will be baptized.

That was our miracle. My last week and we met such an amazing family. We taught about the Restoration last night, and they accepted that we have a living prophet (Tamara said, "I've been wondering where the Noahs and Moseses are now." What?). Tamara's uncle had a Book of Mormon and she never read it and was really happy when I had a copy to leave with them in English. She said that everything clicked during the lesson, that it makes sense and she feels that it's right. We were a little dumbfounded by her response (it's what we pray for every single day, probably 20 times a day) but assured her that it's true. I broke the news to them that I was leaving this week and they wanted to know when I was coming back. :) They were a little confused at church when the bishop asked me and Elder Sarmiento (who's also leaving for Peru) to bear our testimonies.

Oh, that's another story. I got up and of course just started crying. I have been serving in Del Norte for 9 months now, putting all my strength, my heart, my mind into the members here and their neighbors. They are my family, and I am going to miss them so much. If only I could see my family and go to the Del Norte ward on Sunday... When I said that it was my last week on my mission, I heard an "Awww" from the right side of the chapel. I looked over and saw my friend Viri with a sad face. Sister Marroquin said that a lot of the women in the ward were crying--"You even made our investigator cry!" haha and Tamara didn't even know what was going on.

Heavenly Father has blessed me on my mission. I thought I was going to be a wreck during lessons, but I never cried when I taught people. I didn't cry when bearing my testimony. But it's been a tearful week this week. I had my departing interview with President on Saturday and cried through the whole thing. I assured President that I have a very emotional family (sorry to rat you out) and that it's nothing to worry about. At the end of the interview he asked if I had any question for him. I asked him what I should do when I go home, but he didn't have the magic answer. :) He did ask me if he could give me a blessing, and it was a really beautiful blessing. He told me some really special things. One of the most special things is knowing that I was sent to this mission to serve with President Lewis. I'm sure the Jardines (the former mission president) was great, but when I get their picture in my call letter, it didn't feel right. When Grandpa told me that I was actually getting a new president (who I met when I was in the MTC), I felt a lot more peaceful when I saw their picture online. In the MTC I heard that missionaries are often chosen to go to a certain place because of the mission president. And I know that is true for me. Dad, you have some competition because he said if I want to live in Utah he will call some of his sons who have their own businesses. :)

Oh no, too many things running through my head and not enough time or brain power to remember what I was going to say. A lot of missionaries say they are not ready to go home when the time comes because they love their missions so much. President told us a while ago that we can go home either feeling the pain from hard work or of feeling regret. I am going home with the pain from hard work, and I am grateful for that. I have spent my physical and emotional energy, and although I am extremely sad to leave my family here, I know that I am starting a new mission. This was just a spring board, and I don't see it as ending my mission. Tracting is going to end (and for the most part I oddly like tracting), inviting people to be baptized is going to end, the tag is going to come off and I won't stand out anymore. But President doesn't make mistakes--like when he has a read the talk The Challenge to Become by Elder Oaks time and time again. I am converted to this gospel. I know that this is Christ's church, and although I don't know what kind of person I will really be after my mission, I will forever be a missionary. Maybe not a full-time one. But I can't even imagine losing sight of the things I have learned and treasured here--Elder Holland would give me a lecture for that, and it wouldn't be pretty. (He came and spoke to us in January and I was literally on the first row smack dab in front of him when he said you can't even think about walking away from what you have taught on your mission. Got the message!)

Thank you for all your love and support. Your prayers have helped me have the physical and spiritual strength to serve this past year and a half with all my heart, might, and mind. President invited us to read two scriptures every day until Christmas: Luke 2:10-11. And the angel said unto them: Fear not. For I bring you good tidings of great joy, which shall be unto all people. For unto you is born this day in the city of David a Savior, who is CHRIST the Lord. I know that we will have no fear and we will be able to accomplish all our Heavenly Father has for us because of the birth, life, and death of His Son Jesus Christ.

Love,

Hermana Brinkerhoff